Thursday, April 21, 2011

If only Macguyver had ever eaten scat

Desperate for something to write about I resolved to ride my into town (with trailer in tow) and get a bag of grain for our chickens. According to the man at the mill who loaded the grain on my bike trailer, that was a first for him. I'm now famous.

Speaking of fame, my blog post The joys of eating Scat is still one of my most famous currently in fourth place as judged by number of pageviews as counted in the "stats" part of the blog (supplied by Blogger). Part of the stats show how people got to my blog: what words they used to search with (a blatent end of sentence preposition. The Jonases would be appalled). Though it doesn't tell the exact page that was hit, according to Blogger a search for the words "scat eat" resulted in a hit. I hope they were trying to get to this blog. And if they weren't they've got issues.

Looking at the stats of this blog is interesting. For example in the last week this blog has had three hits from Puerto Rico. I've had at least one from Papua New Guinea. Don't get me wrong, those hits are great, and I definitely appreciate them. I must say that they're a bit unexpected though.

As you have probably gathered by now I have almost nothing to write about and am pretty much just pulling stuff out of my ass and writing about it here.

This reminds me of Tug-or-war (think "pulling" and if you don't then it could be kinda a gross connection between the two) which can be seen here in pretty much the awesomest way imaginable. Awesome in the kind of way that makes you want to go right out and buy a new set of tires while burning as much fuel as possible while using a big expensive machine in almost totally pointless ways. But they left cool tire tracks and that alone is worth the expense...just ask the woman whose voice we hear at the end of the video.

I heard these guys were impressed:

The truck tug-of-war seems pointless and silly kinda like this picture of an outdoor hockey rink taken in August:

Now since I mentioned silly, here's a picture of me in the DDD winter race once I got to Dyersville and after I had walked 30 of the 40 miles to get there. This picture fairly accurately tells the tale. And the "Runners" number is ironic considering that I just spent the better part of 12 hours getting here mostly on foot. However it does not capture my feeling at that point that if I ever have to push a fucking bike again I will do my best to gnaw the bike frame apart with my teeth and/or tear it apart at the welds with my Jedi skills and a sawzall.

In case you are wondering why on earth I would keep on going just watch this music video by Macguyver (I think they look similar anyway. And when I watched the video I knew it was blog-worthy by the Star Wars-type music).

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

2k: You'll take what I give you!

Well, I had been telling myself that if the number of pageviews of this blog went over 2,000 I would write some more. Well, lo and behold, it did go over 2,000 a while back but I haven't been riding my bike much or done anything cool (depending on how one defines "cool" I guess). So I have been delaying writing another post until I do something cool/foolish on my bike. That wasn't happening so now I have to write about how I have nothing to write about. In fact, the most exciting thing that I have done is watch steam rise off of the maple sap I was boiling down to syrup:

Scratch that, I forgot about how earth-shatteringly cool this moment was:

Well, now I have the problem of what on earth to call this blog since Arrowhead is over for this year. Maybe this one: "I'll Write Whatever the Hell I Please". Or possibly this related one (that I could dedicate to the septogenarianic (one less decade than an octogenarian) school lunch lady, Charlotte, from my high school): "You'll Take What I Give You!" But then again, nobody is forcing you to read this (or starving you if you don't) and you could simply navigate your browser to this if you don't like what I'm giving you. Speaking of pet videos (which I wasn't, but that last link was to one), while looking at them on youtube I ran across this one which would be disturbing enough if it was just a kitten beating up on a rabbit half it's size. But it's even more disturbing because it's named "white kitten Vs white bunny! (Very Funny video!)" Funny? As far as I can tell nothing funny ever happens in this video. Unless the makers think that pushing around things that can't defend themselves is funny. But I'm off on a fit of seriousness and will try to reign myself in since this is America and we all know that we don't take anything seriously except Glenn Beck.

Well I'm not sure if y'all remember back in this post from January 13th about the woman nearly suffocating a child with her buttocks while riding along:

Maybe the child is breathing sort of like a swimmer that has to turn his head to get air at the right time (in this case I would think that it may be during the downstroke). But then again it could be worse:

We've all heard about the dangers of texting while driving....